The great thing about having 7-year-olds is that they've long ago left behind the urge to put anything and everything into their mouths. The pediatrician's office was always the most cringe inducing to me when my boys were younger. The germy bits of everything they'd touch would inevitably end up in their mouths.
At 7, a visit to the doctor means I hand my sons a book from home and say, "Why don't you read this while we wait?"and they'll each grab the book and... read. So that's what my son was doing while at the pediatrician's office, waiting to be seen for an ache in his leg.
Then in toddled the ghost of sick baby visits past, all sticky fingered, sweaty and bewildered, a blue baby blanket half draped around him. He was about 2, this child, and he stood there in a daze as his mom plunked him down for a moment so she could check in with the receptionist.
Uh oh, I thought to myself, here come all the sick kids.
Then it happened. The poor little fellow gurgled a bit and then sputtered pink and red puke all over the place. It rained down on his clothes, on his baby blanket, on his mom, on the floor and indeed, onto the nearby train table where it flowed down to the floor in tiny drips.
I hopped up and hightailed it toward the restroom in search of paper towls.
"We need paper towels!" I told the receptionist, who I happened to see emerging from the restroom. "A boy out there has thrown up."
"Here, " she said, thrusting a handful of paper towels my way.
"Wet towels, " I answered, pushing past her toward the sink. "And it's not MY kid, " I added.
But still I wanted to help because I remember being that mom in situations like that and feeling so grateful to be surrounded by helpful strangers.
So I returned to the waiting room with wet paper towels and attempted to clean up the mess.
Meanwhile, the receptionist and the nurse failed to kick into action. They were like deer in the headlights.
Don't they see stuff like this happen all the time? Don't they have a bucket of emergency cleaning supplies on hand, just in case a sick child should, well, get sick all over the place? For God's sake, isn't this a pediatrician's office?
I moved the vomit around with my handful of towels. Swish, swish.
The mother of the sick boy was trying to comfort him. They were both dripping in vomit.
"Do you need a bag for his dirty clothes and blanket?" I asked, "I have some in my car."
"Yes," she said, "thank you."
But just when I turned to go, the nurse overheard us and said, "Don't we have garbage bags here?"
At that point, we got called into a room and I left the receptionist and the nurse to help the sick boy and his mother.
Of course, you should have garbage bags. And gloves. And disinfectant. And kind words of comfort BECAUSE YOU ARE A PEDIATRICIAN'S OFFICE. You've seen this before, right?
I have never warmed to the front office staff at our pediatrician's office and it's only out of sheer laziness that I've yet to change to a new one. But I will do so, soon.
Twenty minutes later, my son and I emerged from our small room. The nice doctor gave us her opinion on my son's leg and sent us on our way.
On our way out, I noticed a container of Clorox wipes on the counter of the receptionist's desk that had not been there before. I'm sure it was used to clean up the waiting room but I know that if I'd done the white glove test, I'd have spied pink bits of vomit in the cracks of the train table, and under its legs and beyond. The receptionist had been wearing a beautiful, long winter-like sweater, the type not meant for getting down on one's hands and knees and scrubbing floors.
Heading toward the exit, we passed about 4-5 people in the waiting room. All was calm and the room seemed fairly clean. A toddler played about the train table.
I wanted to throw open the windows, spray a bit of dilluted bleach (or similar) on the train table, put up some yellow caution tape and pronounce the place a biohazard zone, but instead, we just walked past those people and into our car and drove away.
I'm sure they'll all be fine and yes, there are germs and gross things everywhere. We all assume the waiting room toys are full of germs and the remnants of bodily secretions and you know what? It is full of germs and bodily secretions. Will we get sick from it? Probably not. It's just... well, gross.
Ponder that while I move "finding a new pediatrician" to the top of my to-do list!
Chalk and Cheese Chronicles.








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