Chalk and Cheese Chronicles

Is there a midnight boot camp for newbies?

I've mentioned before that the only thing I ever won was at a Gemini Crickets auction fundraiser. I guess my luck is holding because this year, I won again! Ok, everybody seems to win something there, but I like to celebrate my winnings, however small. Usually, that is.

"And the winner of the San Jose Adventure Boot Camp is...Akemi!"

I clapped my hands greefully. Me? Me? A winner?

But then it hit me. I hadn't won the trip to Disneyland, like my fellow twin mom, Linda. I hadn't won the VIP tickets to see a taping of the Dr. Phil show. Nope, I'd won the chance to wake up at 5am, five days a week, for a month of Boot Camp.

What Not to Eat before Sex and the City

My friend leaned over, "Did you see it? They showed his PENIS!"

"Mmmhmm," I replied vaguely, neither confirming nor denying any sighting.

A few minutes later, she tried again, "Those ladies are starting to show their age!"

"Right, " I muttered in agreement.

I had wanted to say more. I had wanted to elaborate and discuss, discuss! Surrounded by a group of moms from my Silicon Valley multiples club for a moms' night out at the movies, I kept mute. The film? "Sex and the City" - but of course! We'd gathered at trendy El Jardin Tequila Bar and Restaurant, sipping wine and dipping into appetizers beneath a canopy of beautiful oak trees. As we later made the move from restaurant to theater and began settling into our seats, I noticed a cloud following me.

Gemini Crickets POM of Silicon Valley Auction Fundraiser

The only thing I ever won, I won at a Gemini Crickets auction fundraiser. There were the silent auctions, the live auctions, and of course, my fave, the good old fashioned raffle drawings. I love the excitement of plunking my tickets into the bags, rubbing each one between my fingers for good luck.

But I almost never win. I used to plop my business card into those fish bowls at various local eateries, hoping to win a complimentary burrito or something, but it never happened. I just don't win things. I leave comments on mommy blogs, describing my ill-fitting wardrobe, or the bags under my eyes, in hopes that the blog owner will pick my name and give me a free t-shirt or a makeover, or something. But I've yet to win anything. No free t-shirts, no makeover, zilch. Nada.