Chalk and Cheese Chronicles

Meeting the World in Fourth Grade

The following post was inspired by the book Close Encounters of the Third Grade Kind by Phillip Done. Mr. Done is certainly the type of teacher whom some of his students will never forget. We can all scan through the list of our grade school teachers and pick the one who made the greatest impression on our young selves. For me, it's a teacher who once invited our entire fourth grade class over for a swim in her condominium pool!

I still have her letters. One is typewritten. A few are handwritten in her familiar cursive. Another is addressed to me in the bold lettering of calligraphy.

She was my fourth grade teacher and when she left our school to get married and move to Honolulu, she and I kept in touch for several years. As Ms. Kirby became Mrs. Izumi, I followed her trail through letters to a world bigger than my own. She wrote to me about her travels to Fiji and Guadalajara and about her life in Hawaii with her new husband, a lawyer.

In her classroom, she brought the world to us. We spent a lot of time talking about different countries. I spent a lot of time with my nose in encyclopedias, turning to the page of the country we were studying, finding the big map (Kenya!) and then tracing its outline onto tracing paper for my book reports. I loved doing those reports. Back in the classroom, the posters would change from Africa to Mexico to Japan. We watched many films about various countries, following the narrator into homes of the world. Our classroom felt like a museum.

Book Club Read: 32 Third Graders and One Class Bunny

I gave my boys' preschool teacher the book, 32 Third Graders and One Class Bunny, as a gift for the holidays. Although taking charge of a bunch of preschoolers at first seems vastly different from a class of third graders, it's really not. Teacher moments happen every day, at every grade level, at every school. Author Philip Done devotes a chapter (an essay)  to "Garage Sales" in which he describes how a little browsing about a garage sale can quickly escalate into a heated competition over a game of Chutes and Ladders the moment another teacher arrives on the scene. Fortunately for Mr. Done, he hasn't bumped into our Ms. R, preschool teacher and garage saler extraordinaire. You should see the garage sale finds which fill her classroom! Last week, the kids played happily with a big red wooden barn, a garage sale treasure, of course. Ms. R would give Mr. Done a run for his garage sale money, for sure. So I gave Ms. R a copy of 32 Third Graders (and no, I didn't find it at a garage sale) and she loved it through and through.

I, too, had laughed my way through the book. I read it via the eyes of my former third grade self. I read it via the perspective of a mom to future third graders. I read it as a wannabe teacher and I read it as someone who just enjoys a good laugh. What a fun read! I wanted to turn back the clocks and have Mr. Done be my third grade teacher. I wanted to race ahead and pre-register my 4-year-olds for Mr. Done's third grade class. I wanted to clear my schedule and head to teacher school. I wanted to laugh.

Elf on the Shelf

Elf on the Shelf here. Just back from a seasonal gig at some crazy Silicon Valley house. I had to monitor two boys, age 4 - twins! The mom picked me up as an impulse buy at her neighborhood toy store. It was a rocky start from the moment she lifted me out of my tidy and quiet little box. She said, "He's so tiny. I thought he'd be bigger."

Hello? I'm an elf, a person of diminutive stature. What was she expecting, a Santa sized elf? Man!

Back at her home, I toppled from the various places she tried to put me. I wanted to scream, Try the shelf! I'm Elf on the Shelf, remember? That first night, I ended up at the top of the Christmas tree from which the view was great except that my eyes are permanently glancing to the right. I need to look like I'm studying the children and not the boring ceiling. Fortunately, it was night time when I first met the children and nobody noticed my wayward gaze. They stared up at me as if I were real. One of them snapped my picture.

The following day, the mom moved me to the top of a heavy picture frame. Again, I had a great view but my eyes were fixated on the window. It hardly gives me credibility with children if I can't make eye contact with them. I made a mental note to stop by Santa's workshop and ask for some posable eyes. Wonder if that would creep the children out if I could follow them with my eyes?

One of the boys stood on tiptoe to get a better look at me. Then he insulted me by asking if I were "just a toy." While I was reeling from that remark, the other boy hurled another one by asking why I didn't have feet or shoes. (Actually, I hadn't noticed and now it does bother me a little.) The mom didn't even bother to make up a story. Do you know what she did? She agreed. She told her son he was right and that it was strange that I didn't have feet. Then she told her Twitter friends about me, the shoeless elf, and a friend wisely replied that elves don't need shoes because they fly! It's obvious my household did not read my book or they would have remembered I fly to the North Pole while the children are sleeping to report on good and bad behavior. I don't need shoes to fly, now do I?

I then spent the next few nights moving all about the house. The mom insisted upon placing me out of reach even though children know that if they touch me, I lose my magic. She even tried placing me atop the vanity mirror in the bathroom but couldn't get me to stay still and moved me out of there, thank God. There was one night when I worried I wouldn't be moved at all until the mom suddenly remembered and jumped out of bed to find me a new spot at 3 in the morning.

A couple of times, I was day dreaming when I heard my name being screamed. The mom was a little upset, "The Elf saw that! He'll tell Santa and you'll get no presents!" Wow - someone was really having naughty behavior that day and I almost didn't catch it.

Sometimes the mother couldn't get the story straight and said, "Santa is watching." Well, that's sort of true. He's watching, but only with the help of the elf minions who work down in the trenches. Without us, Santa wouldn't know a thing. He'd give presents to the naughty and coal to the nice if it weren't for us.

There was one day when the boys were being particularly naughty and I started to feel sorry for the mother. She tries with them, she really does but sometimes those boys are just out of control. I noticed that the mom says things in desperation, trying to evoke good behavior. I almost laughed when she told her kids that not only was I watching, but so, too, were Santa, Santa's cameras, the Grinch, the Gruffalo (who the heck is he?) and someone called karma. As if we all work as a team - yeah, right. I've never even met the Grinch.

I was kept busy writing down names on my list. Both boys leaped from the naughty column to the nice column and back again. On days when the boys were cranky from hunger or fatigue, my presence would only result in a temporary reform in their behavior. Sometimes, the boys would look up at me, consider their actions and go right back to doing what it was they weren't supposed to be doing. Other times, especially in the freshness of morning, the boys would immediately halt the offending behavior and apologize with sincerity.

The best part of the day was always in the morning when the children would wake up and come looking for me. I almost giggled out loud from my perch next to the children's beds when they ran out of the room without noticing me. I would play hide-n-go seek all day if I could.

I hitched a ride back to the North Pole with Santa when he came to bring presents to the boys I'd been monitoring. While I'd love to boast that my presence greatly improved behavior, I'll admit that I only helped things out some of the time. Then why did Santa come? Well, I actually grew to love the little boys in my temporary home and so I, um, cheated. I used a pencil when making my lists and let's just say I did a bit of erasing while on the job. Every child deserves presents.

Original post to Chalk and Cheese Chronicles. Akemi intends to go to Michaels to pick up some little shoes and some stick on googly eyes for the elf when he returns before Christmas next year.

LeapFrog: Creating Haves in a Have-Not World

I love the whole genre of children's books. One of my most favorite activities is browsing about bookstores, especially children's bookstores such as Linden Tree and Hickelbees. If I lived in Portland, Oregon, I'd take up residency within the dusty mansion of Powells Books.

Coffee. Books. Rain. A winning combo.

We are readers. I enjoy buying books for my children. Our structurally weak Ikea bookshelf is at capacity, leaning dangerously to one side. We have board books and picture books, chapter books and lift-a-flap books, vintage books (from my childhood & from used bookstores) and over-sized books from the bargain bin, we have books on CD and books downloaded to my iPod. We also make the rounds of our local libraries, but those outings must be carefully timed to coincide with my boys' good moods; we've been reprimanded there more than once by stern librarians. My husband and I have been reading to our boys since they were tiny bundles. My husband includes an elaborate, improvised story every night before bedtime. In the darkness of the room, two wide-eyed boys stare at the images flying all around, until eventually, they surrender to sleep, hugged by the words of their dad.

Earlier this month, I joined other Silicon Valley Moms Blog contributors for a discussion hosted by LeapFrog. Dr. Anne Cunningham, of UC Berkeley's Graduate School of Education, and on the LeapFrog advisory board, led the forum which focused on the importance of reading to your children. (For a great recap of the discussion, read Linsey's post on Me Too You or this post from a third grade teacher.) What struck me the most during the discussion were the implications of the Matthew Effect which Dr. Cunningham touched upon in her presentation.

The Matthew Effect as applied to literacy describes how the have and the have-nots grow further apart in their reading achievements based on the disparity of their early exposure to reading. Basically, the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. It has largely to do with one's socioeconomic background. In a tiny nutshell, the have-nots have not been given huge doses of language at an early age. So by the third grade, when expectations of language comprehension greatly expands, the have-not kids are at a huge disadvantage. Some of these kids might not ever learn to read.

As I and my fellow attendees gleefully brought home bagfuls of LeapFrog products that night, I started to think about the Matthew Effect of the have and the have-nots. I quite often feel like a have-not by Silicon Valley standards yet as I review all that I've been able to give my children, despite not being materially wealthy, I have to think that my children are very, very lucky. They have parental involvement on their side. They have books, trips to the library, preschool, dinnertime conversation, and now, our new LeapFrog Tag Reading System. Thus, we may not have material wealth, but we are a family firmly on the side of the "haves."

So I wondered, how does LeapFrog attempt to create haves in a have-not world? Clearly, a low income family cannot afford to plunk down over $50 for a Tag Reading System. According to a spokesperson at LeapFrog, the company believes that early literacy experience is the key to reading success. They would like to spread the experience of early literacy to ALL children. LeapFrog is currently developing a program with PACEAPP (Professional Association for Childhood Education Alternative Payment Program) to bring books and possibly the Tag Reading System into the hands of low-income families. The collaboration aims to go beyond the delivery of reading materials and into the realm of educating low-income parents on early literacy skills. LeapFrog also sponsors campaigns like 2008 Read for the Record and promotes literacy through local events and charities. These are just a few of the many programs LeapFrog is implementing in its effort to advance early literacy.

I'm proud of you, LeapFrog,thank you for reaching out to young readers of ALL families. 

Original blog post to Chalk and Cheese Chronicles.

Akemi/svtwinmom is hoping to someday use the Tag Reader to learn a new language. Product development, are you listening?

The Space Shuttle via Mad Libs

Ever since our boys started getting into the knock knock joke mode, my husband has been wanting to show them the humor of Mad Libs. He just thinks it's so funny. I did, too, back when I was eight. Our boys are newly minted 4-year-olds with a newly acquired potty mouth vocabulary, a bonus lesson from preschool.

Yesterday, my husband took one boy out for the afternoon and they returned with two books, The Original #1 Mad Libs and a paperback book called Silly Jokes & Giggles. Ok, I admit to having thumbed through these books a few times, but I just don't think my boys are ready. A 4-year-old child kind of needs some life experience to get this type of humor. Case in point:

What do you get when you cross three tenors and April 1st? Answer: April Fool's Day! (Hmm, don't exactly think a young 4-year old will find the humor in this one)

What cereal is a favorite with young magicians? Answer: Trix! (Do they sell that at Trader Joe's?)

We had a bit better luck with the Mad Libs. Of course, we had to simplify, simplify! Rather than saying, "Give me a noun!", we said, "give me a person, place or thing" but that turned out to be too many choices, so we said, "name a person" or "name a place" and that worked out much better. But the payoff wasn't worth the tedious task of sitting through all the questions, so we cut it short and read what we'd completed and got a few laughs.

So may I present our first ever 3/4 completed page of Mad Libs, culled from the vocabulary of 4-year-olds.

In 1981, the U.S. launched the first real space GRANDMA.
It was named Columbia and was piloted by two brave GRAMMY B's.
They had practiced RUNNING for two years and were expert DINOSAURS and PLANTS.
Columbia took off from SAN FRANCISCO using its powerful first-stage CUP and soared off into the BIG blue ANIMALS.
At an altitude of ONE feet, it went into orbit around a CLOUD.
For people watching from Earth, it was a NICE sight to BURP!

We got lucky that the story ended with a funny word like BURP. I'm dreading the day when my boys refuse to fill in the Mad Libs blanks with anything other than the word POOP. POOP is actually a good word for Mad Libs in that it's a noun (poop is everywhere), a verb (I'm pooping), and of course an exclamation, "POOP!" 

Original post to Chalk and Cheese Chronicles.

SV Moms Book Club: Writing Motherhood

Today, I am participating in a book club hosted by the Silicon Valley Moms Group.  Inspired by the book, Writing Motherhood by Lisa Garrigues, my mission is to write about one of my most outrageous or inexcusable bad mothering moments and gosh, I, um, have so many of such moments. Where to begin?

I guess I'll talk about the time I bad mouthed my own mother in front of my diaper clad children. I only did it because it made me feel better and saying it in front of the children was like saying it in front of a dog. Surely they weren't listening to my little diatribe.